View source for Non-native speakers of English and campaign making

'''Non-native speakers of English face linguistic difficulties''' when writing a campaign to the English-speaking community. Some of these difficulties derive from tyical language deficiencies like spelling, syntax, word order or word choice.

This article will give non-native English speakers some advice on what to pay attention to and how to improve their dialogues from a language perspective. Note that because of the differences between any two non-native speakers of English in regards to the kind of mistakes they make, this article can never fulfil its purpose entirely. This article will merely draw your attention to some typical mistakes non-native speakers make.

By definition, non-native speakers cannot create a campaign that has absolutely no grammatical mistake in it. Knowing every little bit of English grammar is one thing, using it in an accurate way to convey the intended message while sounding natural is another. The more text data there is in the campaign the more likely some sentences will be malformed and some others will just sound wrong to native ears. 

==Expectations==
Not being a native speaker of English is not an excuse that you can always get away with. Some speakers of English (not necessarily natives) aren't bothered by some syntactic or spelling mistakes, while others are especially sensitive to grammatical correctness. Typical syntactic mistakes (like malformed questions like "Are you deploy more fighters?") are easily noticed by anyone. Wordy sentences are a different fish in the kettle &ndash; even native speakers do that when their ideas flow more quickly than they are capable to input them. Wordy sentences are usually ones that contain more clauses than needed (usually linked by conjuctions like ''and'', ''but'', ''however'', ''although''). Such sentences are to be avoided by splitting the wordy sentence into short sentences using full stops (in US English: periods) (.) or, under some circumstances, semicolons (;). Be careful with semicolons. The FreeSpace engine cannot read a ; in its mission code. If you use FreeSpace Open, use $semicolon instead. Users of retail FreeSpace 2 should just use a full stop.

Expectations vary between any two players. Therefore, non-native speakers have to do everything that is within their capabilities to make their campaign as good as possible language-wise to make the job of their native proofreaders as manageable as possible. 

==Native help==
Asking for help by native speakers is a logical thing to do, even if you are confident in your language skills. Bear in mind, however, that before you submit your work for native revision, make sure that you have revised it beforehand. Your proofreader (=grammar checker) will not know what a given sentence is supposed to say, imply, or how it fits into the mission. Without a context and a decent knowledge of your campaign's setting, your grammar checker will inevitably misunderstand some sentences and therefore, the corrected sentence will not imply the same thing as the campaign author originally wanted.

Also keep in mind that not all native speakers are perfect when it comes to the written language. Since native speakers of English learn to speak first then spell the words (as opposed to a typical English class scenario when students learn the pronunciation and the spelling at the same time), so they usually mix up certain words that are pronounced the same but spelt differently (most typically ''it's'' and ''its''; ''there'', ''their'', ''they're''). For this reason, don't take it for granted that the version you receive from your grammar checkers will be final. There can be some typing mistakes (called 'typos') like ''raeson'' instead of ''reason''.

==Naiveté==
Now that you have decided to undertake such a difficult task as to create a FreeSpace campaign in a language that's not your native tongue, you certainly perform well at English classes. That's nice and it will serve you well while you are lost in the middle of London or New York to ask for directions and ask about local habits, points of interest and good restaurants. You probably know how to form a passive sentence from an active sentence or when to prefer the present perfect over the simple past tense. If you think that'll be good enough, you're being naive. For a FreeSpace campaign, you need more than that. Not only will you have to convey your message successfully, you must do it as perfectly as it is possible. Some sentence constructions will sound alien to native ears, others will be too wordy. These mistakes will distract some players' attention from the actual gameplay.

==The influence of native language==
Anyone who says that your native language doesn't influence your study of a foreign language has never took a foreign language lesson himself. Inevitably, you will have such problems while writing anything in a language that's not your native language.

A speaker of each foreign language has typical mistakes that derive from the fact that he bases his English sentences (use of articles, word order, choice of preposition, everything!) on the grammar of his native language. Mistakes range from real serious ones that threaten the apprehension of the sentence; for example omitting auxiliaries is a typical mistake for speakers of Hungarian because there are no auxiliaries of any kind in Hungarian. The results are sentences such as "I manager. I looking for my sister". On the other end of the gradient are benign mistakes such a native speaker of French referring to a ship as a 'he' instead of the conventional 'she' or 'it' (See [http://www.hard-light.net/forums/index.php/topic,54854.msg1114915.html#msg1114915 this]). While the former is a common [[Wikipedia:Engrish|Engrish]] mistake, the latter is related to the way French perceive ships. English either highlights the captain's emotional connection to the ship and use  'she' to refer to the ship or simply use 'it' to give a neutral, unemotional filling to it.

Idioms, slang expressions (including curses), proverbs vary considerably between any two language. Before using any of these in your campaign, look up how it is said in English. Your native help may not know the English equivalent of the proverb you want to use, so make sure that you look it up yourself.

Use of a two-language grammar reference book, or any reference book that was written for speakers of a specific foreign language are useful sources.

==General writing tips==
Here are some relevant outlines that you need to know before submitting your work to native speakers for revision. For a more exhaustive study of creative writing in this Wiki, see [[Mission Chatter]].

Your grammar checkers, however good they are, will not be of much help if the text you submit is not organized clearly and two subsequent sentences are only loosely linked. Take a look at this:

:''Our agent Joseph Zwick is escaping from the NTD Dalton. The system is strongly guarded. The Dalton is an Orion who will launch patrol fighters so watch out. Zwick must be saved. The patrol fighters will surely attack him. The patrol is two groups of Loki fighters but they'll deploy more. Get our spy out there.''

This doesn't sound right. It looks as if the writer didn't know what he wanted to talk about. The ideas are not connected very well, and there are some inappropriate clauses that have to be removed. Well, let's consider what we want our briefing to talk about: The mission's background (our spy has been exposed), the mission objective (get him out!), the enemy you will encounter, and perhaps the GTVA fighers' default loadout.

Let's try to organize this briefing stage a bit more clearly. Translate this into your native language and work with that if that's what you prefer. Otherwise just categorize the sentences based on what they are about, change the order, then, if possible, use linking words like ''because'' or ''nevertheless'' to clarify how the clauses (=parts of the sentence) are related. Another trick is to use so-called weasel words to make it a little bit more colourful. Weasel words are words that serve no or limited real purpose, for example ''You know'' ''Unfortunately'', ''You can probably see that'', etc.

Here's a quick revision:

:''Our agent Joseph Zwick is escaping from the NTD Dalton. Unfortunately, the system is strongly guarded, expect heavy resistence. The Dalton, an Orion class destroyer, will launch patrol fighters as soon as you enter the area of engagement. Zwick must be saved at all costs. Since he had been ixposed, the patrol fighters will attack him. Get our spy out there and return to base.''

Now you can see how the ideas relate to each other. Note that the sentence "You'll fly Hercules fighters" has been removed. Perhaps it's a better idea to deal with the friendly fighters in the next briefing stage after the mission has been outlined. The above paragraph is still not good enough, but it's a step ahead in comparison with the first draft. Native speakers can now help in correcting your word choice ("strongly guarded" should be "heavily guarded"; "area of engagement" should be "field of engagement" and spelling (''ixpose'' to ''expose'') or possible punctuation (hyphenate "Orion class destroyer" to  "Orion-class destroyer"). Any native speaker could help in picking the correct word. Fewer can spell perfectly and even fewer know when hyphens are used.

==Printed material==
Here are some reference books you can use while writing lines of dialogue to your campaign. There are online versions of all of these, which you are free to use if that's your preference. The greatest advantage of printed materials over electronic ones is that you can access printed material without the Internet &ndash; or without a computer. Jumping back and forth between tabs is not everybody's preference.

===Dictionaries===
Using a dictionary to look up a word is an evident decision. There are all kinds of dictionaries that you can use.

====Two-language dictionaries====
A two-language dictionary is a dictionary that gives you words in ''Language A'' and its equivalents in ''Language B''. Dictionaries with unambiguous titles like English-German Dictionary and German-English Dictionary are typical examples. These dictionaries are useful to look up nouns that denote things that can be found everywhere: vehicles, tools, parts of a ship, to name a few FS-relevant ones. You can also look up terms related to human characteristics (''proud'') or ones that describe a situation (''blunder'').

====English-only dictionaries====
Because not every word in your native language has its perfect equivalent in English, complement your two-language dictionary research with an English-language dictionary (Oxford, Longman, Merriam-Webster are the popular ones).

Abstract nouns, adjectives, adverbs and conjunctions typically have some slight meaning differences between the two languages. The correct use of conjunctions and prepositions can be looked up in an English-only dictionary. To illustrate the point, suppose you are looking for a word that expresses contrast. You look up your mothertongue's equivalent of ''although'' and find the following forms: ''although'', ''though'', ''even though'', ''however'', ''despite''. These words aren't interchangeable at all. Contrast the definitions that your English-only dictionary gives. Here's a specific example that deals with ''although'', ''however'' and ''despite'', taken from ''Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary'' (7th edition):

:'''although''' [1] used for introducing a statement that makes the main statement in the sentence seem surprising (SYN ''though'') ; Although the sun was shining it wasn't very warm. [2] used to mean 'but' or 'however' when you are commenting on a statement; "I felt I was wrong, although I didn't say so at the time."<br>
:'''despite''' [1] used to show that sth happened or is true although sth else might have happened to prevent it (SYN ''in spire of''); "Her voice was shaking despite her efforts to control it" "Despite applying for hundreds of jobs, he is still out of work."<br>
:'''however''' [3] used to introduce a statement that contrasts with sth that has just been said: "He was feeling bad. He went to work, however, and tried to concentrate." "We thought the figures were correct. However, we have now discovered some errors."

You can see that all three of these words express contrast between ideas, but are used differently. ''Although'' is a true conjunction; it's used to show contrast between two clauses. ''However'' needs at least two sentences to work. Therefore you can start your first paragraph with ''although'' but not with ''however'' ("Although the party was good, we left early." "The party was good. However, we left early."; "However, the party was good, we left early" is incorrect) ''Despite'' is similar to ''although'', but it's used before a noun clause, not a verb clause. ("Despite her best <u>efforts</u>, we couldn't hear her." "Although she <u>did</u> her best, we couldn't hear her.")

In more fortunate situations, it also gives you a small box that deals with these 'synonyms' in detail.

===Thesaurus===
A thesaurus (or synonym finder) is another useful type of dictionary. It gives you no definitions of any sort, but it does give you a lot of words that have a <u>related</u> sense to the word you're looking up.

Complement your thesaurus with a 'real' dictionary that explains what these words mean. There are no such a thing as two words being completely synonymous with each other. Your synonym finder will give you a number of words that have a related meaning. Some words denote the same thing, but under conditions. Consider the following example (taken from the Concise Oxford Thesaurus (3rd ed.)):
:'''discuss'''  (''verb'') "I discussed the matter with my wife"; '''talk over''', talk about, talk through, converse about, debate, confer about, deliberate about, chew over, consider, weigh up, consider the pros and cons of, thrash out; (informal) kick around/about, bat around/about

Lot of words, isn't it? You can pinpoint some pairs and explain the difference between their meanings. Here are a few:
*''talk over'' entails that there is some kind of agreement in the end
*''talk through'' denotes (and highlights) the difficulties that the speaking partners were facing
*''debate'' denotes a little bit more intensity in the speech acts
*''chew over'' is first of all more informal than any of the above and it also denotes difficulties in addition to length
*''consider the pros and cons of'' entails that the speaking partners put more emphasis on the advantages and disadvantages of a given situation<br>
Well, you can see that these senses are related, but are not interchangeable (=completely synonymous). It does matter whether you talk about the weather or discuss it. Talking about it is something you do on a daily basis. Discussing it is the job of meteorologists.

Use a thesaurus to pick the best word and to enrich the vocabulary of your writing.

===Grammar reference===
There are advanced grammar reference books in circulation in any country. Your high school English book is not what you're looking for. You need something that deals with English grammar in greater detail. A traditional English schoolbook gives you some definitions and examples and attempts to explain the most common uses of a certain grammatical structure, but it's not everything that you need.

Look up strange and complex sentence structures (use or ''neither... nor''), proper use of prepositions and tenses here, to name just a few.

===Miscellaneous reference books===
Miscellaneous reference books include more specialized language books like preposition guides, phrasal verb dictionaries or idiom collections. Consult these guides if you run into a very specific problem; say, you don't know whether it should be 'concerned <i>by</i>' or 'concerned <i>with</i>'. As you read these books, note down a couple of expressions you like and try to insert them into your dialogues if it makes sense to.

Be careful with slang and idiom dictionaries. Slang is prone to change, so it's not likely that a slang expression in use today will be used at the time your FreeSpace campaign takes place. Idioms too. Sometimes the expressions are just out of context. Imagine a commanding officer say "The NTD Gaia has kicked the bucket". It's been 400 years since that expression came up in the Wild West. An average Joe in the FreeSpace era will not know why kicking the bucket can be related to death.

===Other media products===
Novels, newspapers, movies, text-rich travel guides are also very useful. These products were not written with students of English in mind, unlike grammar reference books that try to explain (often superficially) some points of grammar. These products are a more realistic representation of the actual language in use.

First of all, make sure that the material you choose is written by a native English speaker (or it was translated to English by a native speaker). Arthur Koestler's ''[[Wikipedia:Darkness at Noon|Darkness at Noon]]'' is reliable, so is James Luceno's ''[[Wikipedia:Star Wars: Labyrinth of Evil|Star Wars: Labyrinth of Evil]]''; an essay written by a university student or a random blog entry of an unknown author should be treated with due care.

Novels utilize a tremendous set of vocabulary ranging from all sorts of clause-opening words (''notwithstanding'', ''due to the need to...'') to refined vocabulary items that denote actions (''cower''), feelings (''apathy'') or describe situations (''quagmire''); movies give a lot of instances of everyday talk. From a FreeSpace campaign maker's perspective, noting down every unknown vocabulary item and looking them up in a dictionary takes too much time. When you come across an unknown word, try to conclude if it would be worth it to look it up; a word that denotes a strong emotional state would be worth it, especially if you're making a [[Character-Driven Campaigns|character-driven campaign]]; another word that denotes a piece of Ancient Japanese clothing is not. Most importantly, avoid overly rhetoric words and expressions. Those words are simply inappropriate for a FreeSpace context. 

Movies are great to extract some everyday collocations (word combinations that always come together) or frequently used phrases: ''Under these circumstances'', ''baffle about''. Use of subtitles is recommended.

==Working with sentence patterns==
As you read native English speakers' writings, you will come across a lot of sentences that sound good, and you decide you want to use a similar sentence in your campaign. <u>Important!</u>: Using entire sentences or sentence combinations can become unlawful, see [[Wikipedia:Plagiarism|Plagiarism]]. Take out small chunks only. Before using a whole sentence from a media product, consider how general the sentence is. A sentence that requests surrender is a generic one (see below), and there's no harm in using it unless it's said in a unique way. Half a paragraph (with some proper names changed) from Barack Obama's inauguration address is too unique. There will be no actual legal action taken (possibly), but it will be noticed and frowned upon.

There will be sentences that you need to modify to fit your campaign's context. Consider the following sentence from the main FreeSpace campaign (A debriefing stage of [[The Romans Blunder]]):

:''Eighty percent of their pilots was wiped out in Deneb, so they're desperate for new pilots.''

A possible rephrase:

:''Sixty percent of our task force was wiped out in recent battles, so we're desperate for new pilots.''

The example sentence and the rephrase uses the same sentence pattern, with a shift in viewpoint (their --> our), some words and the two noun phrases modified.

There are word combinations or grammatical structures that you come across. The following is taken from one of the quest descriptions of ''[[Wikipedia:World of Warcraft|World of Warcraft]]'':

:''My Witherbark companions don't take kindly to strangers around their home.''

You like the expression "don't take kindly to sth" and decide to use it. This is a possible [[FREDder]]-usable sentence that uses this expression (possibly in a debriefing):

:''I don't take kindly to your wayward actions, pilot.''

There are generic sentences that just fit the context. The following sentence was taken from the novelization of [[Wikipedia:Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (novel)|''Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith'']], written by Matthew Stover:

:''You will be given no further chance.''

This is a general warning to surrender. You can find such warnings in numerous novels, movies and games. If you use this sentence in your campaign, not only will it be grammatically correct, there will be no real harm done to Matt Stover or anyone who has ordered a surrender uttering this sentence, because these sort of sentences are just too common. There have been thousands of them.

==Variants of English==
:''For more information, see [[Wikipedia:American and British English differences]] and [[Wikipedia:American and British English spelling differences]]''

English is not written and spoken universally around the world. The English language is typically divided into two variants: [[Wikipedia:British English|British English]] and [[Wikipedia:American English|American English]]. Other variants like Canadian or Australian English are the mixture of these two.

There is no standard in the community as to which variant should be used in user-made campaigns. The FreeSpace games were written in American English because its staff was (chiefly) American, but there are numerous speakers of British and other variants in the community. As a non-native speaker of English, mixing these two main variants is a forgivable crime. Being inconsistent with the variants is the most legitimate piece of criticism you can get. Not using American English in your campaign despite the games being released in the US is not valid argumentation. Unless you mix the variants in a spectacular way, you'll not receive criticism. However, being consistent gives a good impression to those who notice.

Unless you are determined to use the variant that you prefer, you can leave it all up to your grammar checker(s). If there's only one proofreader, there's no problem. If there are two (or more), ask which country they are from. Hiring a British speaker to proofread the first part of your campaign and an American the second, you'll end up with a campaign that's inconsistent. Unless you are well-versed in British English-American English differences, you can explain it away and leave it as that, or convince your proofreaders to reach a compromise.

==External links==
*[http://dictionary.reference.com/ Dictionary.com], a reliable online dictionary and thesaurus.
*[http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Atlantis/2284/ English to English], a collection of American English-British English differences

[[Category:FRED]]